This morning, with the roads dark, icy and covered in snow, I closed-out my final miles of 2019 on the treadmill at the gym. My final seven miles of the year, brought me to a total of 130 for the month of December and an all-time high of 1,773.5 for the year. I far surpassed my completed mileage from previous years, even without having any personal goals or too many races scheduled for the year. This was also my first time reaching over 200 miles in a month.

The great thing about 2019 was not having any personal goals. But accomplishing so many peaks regardless of that.

I just allowed myself to push, make mistakes, learn, and push more. But be smart about it.

I traveled to Arizona in February and completed my first marathon of the year and traveled to Sparta, Wisconsin in October for a totally epic marathon in the fall. Both were adventurous trips with my husband, filled with outdoor adventures and new and unique experiences together. I set a marathon personal best in Arizona with a finish time of 3:51:09.

I also completed one local half marathon in April. This would be my one and only half marathon of the year (when I've run up to sixteen some years), leaving with another personal best of 1:50:12.

The rest of my miles would be with clients or on my own this year.

Reaching close to 1,800 miles may seem half-crazy to some of you. And to others it may seem like a drop in the bucket. To me it just shows me that I am showing up for the right reasons. For me. And because I absolutely love it. Not because I'm trying to prove something. But because it's now a part of me. I'm no longer that intimidated young girl in gym class. My passion for it all runs through my veins -- and it pours out through my sweat. I'm willing to show up for myself every single day. Whether its on the road. At the gym. In my studio. Or sometimes at a race.  I don't need to register for an event to prove something to myself or to hold myself accountable. Because after all these years, I'm realizing that isn't what really motivates me. It's just the accomplishment of showing up for me. I've learned what motivates me and what doesn't. When I function the best. I know the environments in which I strive to do my hardest work. And that's where I place myself. I also have realized that I cannot overextend myself to others, if I cannot allow the time to focus 100% of the same effort on myself. This applies to both my family and my clients. I function best at home and in the studio or at a running group when I have also given 100% to myself, too.

My word and the motto that I chose for myself back in January was FEARLESS for 2019. I wanted to close-out the year fearless, while feeling so much anxiety and fear back in the early part of the year. I left my comfortable position of nineteen years to finally pursue my passion with Running Diva Mom full-time. I didn't know how our daily schedule would work. I didn't know how our finances would flow. I didn't know how my time for myself would work into the routine either.

Early on, I over-scheduled myself, said yes to commitments that I shouldn't have, gave up some time to myself and tried to juggle too many balls in the air at once. Once I really started focusing on myself, aligning my days with my priorities at home and said "no" to a few things -- it was only then that my anxiety was lifted, I felt lighter, I slept better, I gave more passion to my family, my clients - and myself. During the summer months when the kids were home, I realized that in order to give my family the attention that it needed, that I would need to rise even earlier to make time for myself, set "office and studio hours" and leave the house with my family to have scheduled adventures so that I was not multi-tasking from June through August. As the kids went back to school in the fall, I noticed that I was sleeping better, felt like I had a better balance and that my body was feeling great due to my personal runs and my strength and cross training at the gym. My business was also thriving.

2019 has ended in a really good place. And I honestly do feel FEARLESS. I feel strong in all areas of my life and look forward to continuing to improve in all areas next year.

Now I just need to focus on my word for 2020.

If you'd like to join me for my January 12th Workout & Goal Setting workshop, there are still spots. It's going to be filled with sweat, vision boards, worksheets, private goal setting sessions and tons of motivational music and lyrics.

Reflecting on 2019:

January - 98 mi
February - 70.7 mi
March - 138 mi
April - 155.8 mi
May - 172.5 mi
June - 186.5 mi
July - 185 mi
August - 225.3 mi
September - 160.5 mi
October - 133.2 mi
November - 118 mi
December - 130 mi

Total: 1,773.5 miles